Rescue a lost one{help}

I am a complete newbie and I need help.



I am possibly wishing to pursue a career in Network Security in the far off future and become certified and I desperately wish to begin now however, for me at least, I am finding it incredibly hard to find relevant starting points that teach me things. So far what I have found is info. that has prompted me to download tool

after tool

after tool

after tool



I actually really want to HOW and WHY things work and what they do rather then use these tools. I don't feel like I am really learning anything if im using a tool unless it is something necessary(like Metasploit maybe)



I know programming knowledge is key, I have some novice experience with coding simple programs in C++ and I have about a weeks worth of experience in Python, I just don't know how to cross the threshold and use my knowledge for something related to infiltration/hacking.



To the point: I don't want to be one of those people(I forget what they are called) that just uses tools. I want to know whats happening behind the scenes and why and I need a serious point in the right direction. I have countless books, ebooks, and notepad documents about all kinds of subjects but I feel like I am in a rut because I have no direction and doing this completely by myself.



This is my last hope, can anyone help? Point me towards the right direction and show me the light.



(outdatedbooks I have &t.&t: Macro assemblers bible, undocumented DOS,violent python[im getting to it], 2 C++ books, 1 GB worth of text docs from sketchy sites, CEH videos)



(Programs I have: Latest Ubuntu, Kali Linux/backtrack, Metasploit[free], Ms-DOS VB, Python2.7, Code::Blocks, Wireshark, T(A)iLs, many other things I downloaded and deleted/forgot to delete)



Edit: Although I know what TCP, UDP, DDoS/DoS, R.A.T.S., etc. are, I don't know how they work(besides the protocols, I know how they work) or how to do them.